Ryan Seacrest Naked, Oprah’s Army, Valerie Bertinelli Talks About Spitzer’s Dick

God dag, Doc B. here,

Easter's upon us, so spring must be near, soon enough, flowers will begin to pop-up, days are longer, the weather gets hotter, and we can store the heavy jackets, as another winter has passed. Soon, the East coast girls will be just as undressed and reckless as the West coast girls, and these posts will write themselves thanks to all the activity in la-la land.
Remember this is all in fun. Let’s move on.


But first…


“Comedy is life viewed from a distance; tragedy, life in a close-up.”
“Charlie Chaplin”


Idol’s Exile Island

Bo Bice, Ace Young, and Jon Peter Lewis, all Idol finalist, are going to summer camp, Idol camp to be precise.Once there, are lucky American Idol non-winner, will mentor spoiled rich, snotty brats, perform songs for their amusement like the hired help they’ve become. The three Idol cast-offs will even teach some classes. (OH joy). Is it just me, or does this camp seem like the ultimate destination for the “not-quite” Idols who are desperate enough to keep cashing in on their brief moment of fame.

No doubt the A.I. camera’s will be there to manufa…. capture the tender, warm moments that the Idols actions inspire in the children, like, perhaps when Bo Bice, in a moment of pure spontaneity, picks a log beside the fireplace, and starts banging it on the floor, while leading the young campers in a chant to lift their little’s spirits. “It just doesn’t matter, it just doesn’t matter” yells Bo. The campers cheer him on, as Bo tells them that “it just doesn’t matter if they win or lose.” Yes. Because Bo would know all about winning right. Idols cameras would be there to immortalize the moment. Perfecto. Then, the show could cut to another touching Idol Camp moment, when that good lookin finalist Ace Young, helps “Camp Idol” win a big wrestling match against their bitter rivals from camp “So You Think You Can Dance”. Classic! Another Idol water cooler moment. Finally the last segment would no doubt feature that crazy Jon Peter Lewis winning a cross-country marathon so Camp Idol could walk off with the trophy. Of course all these segments would be aired as filler during elimination episodes when the group is smaller. Wow, I tell ya that American Idol is on well oiled machine with all cylinders firing.
There is no escape. Source: LATimes


When Audiences Attack

A woman from Chicago is suing the Oprah show, claiming she was pushed down a flight of stairs by the crowd rushing for first come, first serve seating. You know I’ve seen the look on the faces of the crowds that attend the Oprah show, and they’re scary. Seriously, don’t get in between these people. They so want to be in the presence of the Empress Oprah that they would gut and skin anyone that gets in the way. If you look into their eyes you will understand.There is no life, no soul, just darkness.Brrrrr. You’ve been warned folks, stick to Regis and Kelly tapings. Way Safer!
Source: A.P.


One Dick At A Time

Well, well, well, it seems that Valerie Bertinelli (TV’s “One Day At A Time”) has been getting around nicely, thank you very much. How else would you explain this remark then, overheard in a N.Y. restaurant. “I care less about Eliot Spitzer’s dick than I do about healthcare.”
Hmmm… She doesn’t seem to care about issues in this, an important time in American politics. However, in the women’s washroom, I’m sure she was very convincing when she told her friends that she cared more about Rudy Guiliani’s ball-sack, Than she did about the economy.
There’s always two sides, they like to say.
Michael Musto : Village Voice


Ryan Seacrest’s Secret Twin

I was amazed reading an interview with Ryan Seacrest, at how much we have in common, he and I. In the interview Ryan answered a question this way. “Me naked! I’m not turned on by it.” Yup, that makes two of us. See, we’re like twins, of somethin’.
Source: L.A.Times.

Gotta go folks, I better finish painting my rabbits if I want Easter eggs by tomorrow. As my twin would say.

Seacrest, Out!

Doc. B.