Brangelina, Britney, Tinky-Winky, Minnie and more, tonight on BubbaHump!

Heidi Ho folks Doc B. here.

It turns out it was Bubble' s husband who was staking out my house. He made an attempt to rescue Bubbles but he failed. Now Antonio has taken her to a hidden location. At least that's what Bruce tells me. I still don't remember much but it's good to be home. Every day that goes by now I thank my lucky stars for having a good friend like Bjork. Anyhow here's the news.


But first…

“The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death! What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating......and you finish off as an orgasm".
“George Carlin”


It Could Be Worse, He Could Be A Felon.

"Minnie Driver says the father of her unborn baby will play a major role in their child's upbringing," by remaining nameless, anonymous, nonexistent, so to speak. She has remained silent about the identity of the baby.
"I'm just unorthodox. I'm taking full responsibility for being a mother but he will still play some part. I'm not married and I'm not getting married to this person. So I don't know what's going to happen. I sort of just take it moment by moment. Everyone's grown up, everyone is cool. You just want to create as happy and loving an environment as you can." Which loosely translated folks, means the father is either a dirt bag, broke, or totally irresponsible. Rumors were that the sperm donor was musician Craig Zolezzi. Humph... a musician you say eh. That would explain it. I think I nailed two out of three in my translation, I guess only Minnie knows if he's a dirt bag. Oh well, accidents happen. Source Here


Is This Going To Take Much Longer?

"The Babegelinies Are Still in the Brangelinewomb" reports Celeb-edge. I only wish my bladder was as resilient as Angie's womb. I can't take much more of this, and it's costing me a fortune in laundry soap. I keep refreshing the pages I'm on, waiting for the big news. This birth thing is taking forever, months even. When the hell is she due anyways? Aww... August! Hmmm... maybe I can steal some Depends from grandma. Source Here


Well What Did You Expect, Reginald?!

It's a case of, you asked for it, you get it."Gwen Stefani is involving her two-year-old son, Kingston, in choosing the new baby's name". The possibilities so far are, Pooh-Pooh, Thirsty, No!, Dipsy, Laa-Laa, Po, and Tinky Winky. Oh, and Barney. Hmm... I think I like No! Whew. Well that's enough nursery tales, let's move on shall we. Source Here


Beating The Odds.

Well how about that, she made it. Amy Winehouse performed at Mandela's birthday blowout and by all accounts, " rose to the occasion and defied critics". Way to Go Amy, now let's go get f**ked up! Oh yeah, bad idea. My bad. Source Here


Oh What A Lovely Train Wreck.

It looks like MTV is toying with the idea of letting Britney Spears back on the Video Music Awards telecast. The president of MTV Network Music Group is trying to play it coy, saying. “Everyone deserves a second or third chance, right?" Hmmm... what the hell is he talking about, she only had that one rather uninspired performance last year. He ain't married to her, so what does he mean second or third chance? She's gold! Gold I tell you! It'll be a ratings bonanza. I'm pretty sure Britney wants to appear MTV will find a way to accommodate her. You know what would be a real coup? If they could get Britney and Amy Winehouse to duet on a song we'd have replied chance of seeing two possible train wrecks at the same time. I know I'd tune in. Source Here


Who's My Daddy?!

The New York Daily News reports "Lohan's father may have secret love child".
The secret love child in question replied, "my dad is Michael Lohan? F**k me! Does he know were I live? He does! Well that's just f***ing great isn't it. Shit!"
Michael on the other hand seems to be taking it all in stride. Michael Lohan said he's willing to take a paternity test.
"I will do what's necessary to find out the truth and handle the matter as I should," he said. Hmmm... he seems rational, for now. I'll keep you folks posted. Source Here


Well that's it folks, I gotta go. Bruce has been staying in the garage through this whole ordeal. Luis says the smell curls his whiskers, so I guess I know what I'm doing this afternoon.

Doc B. Gone baby gone