Britney’s 3 Car Pile-Up, Heathers Mills = PUKE

Heidi-Ho folks Doc. B. Here,

I can’t believe it. Antonio, my chimp has taken off with his ex-wife Lucinda, to renew their vows. With my car. At least that’s what Bruce my boxer said they did anyways. I don’t know if I should call the police because Bruce has pulled my leg before, and I can never tell if he’s being serious. What to do, what to do. Oh well, it’s not your problem. Here’s the news.

But first…

“Your highness, when I said that you are like a stream of bat's piss, I only mean that you shine out like a shaft of gold when all around it is dark”
“Monty Python”


Dolly’s Gay-dar Unparalled

I’ve always thought that Dolly Parton had a nice way of putting things. In http://www.ew.com/ she revealed this insight into men ''When I talk to a man, I can always tell what he's thinkin' by where he's lookin'. See, if he's lookin' at my eyes, he's lookin' for intelligence. If he's lookin' at my mouth, well, he's lookin' for wit and wisdom. If he's lookin' anywhere else except my chest... he's lookin' for another man.'' I couldn’t agree more. Your humble Doc. B. wouldn’t kick Dolly out of bed for eating watermelons… I mean crackers. (Blush).


Britney’s Road Rage Or My Imagination

Britney Spears in three car accident. Would you believe Spears rammed a car in front of hers into another car, that in a fit of road rage, fuelled by Banana Daiquiris’ and Red Bulls, combined with amphetamines and dark chocolate Ladyfingers, she snapped! The jaws of life had to be used by the fire dept. to free spears from her vehicle. They discovered Britney unharmed, wearing only yellow socks and a purple tank top that read “Death to Smoochy”. Spears seemed disoriented, muttering to the police that her name was Lola and she needed to get to the church on time… Nope, I didn’t think you’d buy it. Sorry. This is what really transpired.
The pop star was involved in a minor traffic accident late Saturday, but no one was injured and no vehicles were damaged, authorities said.
Spears was driving her 2008 Mercedes on the eastbound Ventura Freeway just east of the 405 freeway about 8:20 p.m. when the mishap occurred, said California Highway Patrol Officer Patrick Kimball.
Spears was in stop-and-go traffic when her car struck a 2006 Nissan in front of her that had stopped. The Nissan then pushed forward into another vehicle.
Britney’s driving is starting to remind me of the old Irish woman who lived next door to me (God rest her soul). Sorry about getting your hopes up at the beginning there. A guy can dream, can’t he? Source Here


Hurricane Heather Blows Smoke Up Our Ass

Well folks, thanks to Donald Trump. Paul McCartney’s Ex-shrew has a platform to continue to poison the airwaves. In an interview, she continues to try to convince people that she’s not a gold digging, angry, bitter, ex-soft core porn model, but a woman who’s been misjudged. Here’s what she spewed.

She went on to boast about pouring water over the head of Macca's lawyer Fiona Shackleton at the end of the High Court case. Mills claimed that she had done it to "cleanse and baptise" her.
Speaking from Las Vegas, where she is a judge in the Miss USA beauty contest, she said: "Mrs Shackleton said something under her breath so I cleansed and baptised her. I thought she looked fantastic.
Mills also told GMTV that she had no regrets about representing herself during the divorce case, despite Judge Bennett accusing her of being a "less than candid" witness, living in a land of "make-believe".
She then accused the judge - one of Britain's most respected - of being "one-sided" in his damning judgment, which left her reputation in tatters. Mills admitted: "People love me or hate me." Source Here
I don’t know about you folks, but I vomit my Cheerios every time she opens her mouth. Thanks Donald, for legitimizing this woman’s presence by giving her a job. You moron.


Insane In The Membrane

Boy this Robbie Williams guy is going “cuckoo for Cocoa puffs” over this UFO business. I’ve told you before how he was planning to buy property in the desert to search the stars for the hot rods of the Gods. Now he’s co-produced a documentary to be broadcast on BBC radio.

The star is to present a radio documentary about extra terrestrials that's he's made with documentary maker Jon Ronson. The pair recorded it earlier this year near Robbie's home in Los Angeles and at a UFO conference in Nevada. Source Here

Hmmm… maybe this guy should get back in the studio and record some songs before people start to peg him as a nutcase. I know I’m beginning to have my doubts.


Obama says ,Tis But A Scratch, I’ve Had Worse

It would appear that John Cleese want’s to offer his services to Barack Obama as his speechwriter. Well if this is true, think how much livelier he would be at rallies or debates. Just imagine.

Doc. B.: Senator Obama, what do you say to those who ask why you supported Bush in the war in Iraq?

Obama: I didn’t support the war in Iraq.

Doc. B.: Sir, I have the senate report in front of me and it records that you did indeed vote to support the war.

Obama: No it doesn’t

Doc. B.: Sir it does

Obama: No it doesn’t

Doc. B.: Yes it Does

Obama: No it doesn’t

Doc. B.: Yes it Does

Obama: Doesn’t

Doc. B.: Does

Obama: Doesn’t

Doc. B.: Senator all you are doing is contradicting me now.

Obama: No I’m not

Doc. B.: Yes you are

Obama: No I’m not

Doc. B.: Oh, never mind. And now for something completely different.


B-Listers On Parade

If I were to say Pamela Anderson, Ben Affleck, Marcia Cross, Perez Hilton, Lauren Conrad, and Hayden Panettiere all in one place, you’d think “Scary Movie 12” right. Nope, this incredibly, distinguished bunch have been invited to the White House. They are among the celebs on the list to attend the White House Press Correspondents Association Dinner on April 26.
I guess Carmen Electra. George Hamilton, Shannon Doherty, and Ron Jeremy declined the offer. Source Here


Well that’s it folks. I gotta go see a dog about a pair of monkeys.

Doc. B. Gone baby, gone.